Saying Goodbye

Our family drove up early to help with whatever my brother needed. His church overwhelmed us all with kindness, food, and thoughtfulness. It's how God's church should react in a time of sorrow, it was really beautiful. Linsey's family filled the house and the church fed us all; it was good to be together, even if we didn't know each other that well.





My brother asked me to sort through some of Linsey's things to put on her memorial table--what an amazing life and accomplished young woman she was! It was sweet to get to know her better in this unexpected way. There are so many words I could write, but it's all so soon, and I still feel kind of numb. The house is quiet, everyone is at youth group. I'm still hiding out. I suppose I'll have to get back to it here soon. 

Here are some pictures, because I know sometime down the road, we'll be able to look back at them with a different perspective, less of sadness and more of honor and sweet memories. I think my brother did a beautiful job planning his bride's memorial service. It pointed to Christ, it echoed Linsey's heart, and it was filled with memories of a very special person.













Mr. M needed a break from all the strangers hugging and holding him. He is a sharp little guy, and he didn't forget their names once he was introduced. I spent my time tailing him, and Buck spent his time tailing me. We ended up in the playroom where the little ones would stay during the service. M didn't want me to leave, he's struggling with who comes back and who doesn't. I told him I was going into the big room with all the flowers, and that I'd be back in a little while. He started crying and said, "I want to go to the sanctuary, too!" What two-year-old knows that word? :) I told him after the service he could smell all the flowers and pick out whichever ones he wanted to take home. He liked that idea. I also mentioned the cookies later, he liked that idea too! But he still didn't want me to leave him. Buck had a brilliant idea; he went to get Brennen. M is a huge fan of Brennen, and B was kind enough to sit out the service with M in the nursery. He even got paid! Much to his surprise :) As soon as my brother picked M up and they found me in the cafeteria, M said, "You told me I would have fun, and I did! You were right!" Love that goofy boy :) And he did eat cookies, and we did smell all the flowers, and he did choose one basketful to take home. Promise kept.







That night a major snowstorm hit, dumping eight impossible inches of snow on the ground. My brother, the baby, and mom left early to make the three-hour drive to the burial site. 



We planned to leave just one hour later, and discovered our van could NOT make it out of my brother's neighborhood. We had the car and kids packed up, we took several runs at it, and then waited for nearly two hours for snowplows to arrive. With no time left, and no plows in sight, we loaded up again. Buck tried one hill three times, the other two, then went back to the original hill. Just as we crested the ridge, with just a car length to go . . . the van refused to move another inch, and the snowplow man rumbled by 10 feet in front of us. Buck backed down the hill again, and blasted up the opposite side--onto the freshly plowed street. That was the start of a very sketchy drive. Very sketchy.



We ended up missing the burial, it was very brief. However, we spent the afternoon with my cousins, walked over to the freshly covered grave, and said another round of goodbyes to my sweet "Sis." 

Seeing these two little guys play together was a crazy flashback to their two dads playing together 30 years ago--one with blond curls, the other with red :)

It's always good to end a difficult day with a giant smile :)